Monday, October 22, 2007

Weis and New Irish Recruits Kobayashi and Eater X Vow to Eat All Evidence of 2007 Season!

After Notre Dame's loss to USC this past weekend, Charlie Weis made a vow: all evidence of the Fighting Irish's 2007 season must be destroyed. This presents quite a challenge. There are countless newspapers covering the program, lots of video sources, and of course, the internet. This matters to nothing to Charlie Weis. He has a plan to get rid of the offending media:

Eat it. All of it.

"I've given athletic scholarships to Eater X and Takeru Kobayashi to help me with this cause," said Weis. "I just can't let any records of this horrible season exist for the rest of time. By the time the three of us are done chowing down, nobody will remember a thing about 2007 and what a crappy crappy job I did."

The addition of Eater X and Kobayashi will no doubt aid Weis in his quest to devour all the evidence of the catastrophic failure known as the 2007 season.

"Newspaper? I eat." Mumbled Kobayashi between munches on "The Irish Gazette." "Video tape? I eat. Computer with internet? I eat. "People who watch Notre Dame game and remember the score? I eat. Announcer who announce game on ESPN? I eat." Yes, he eat.

"I'm excited to be a part of the Notre Dame tradition." remarked Eater X. "I feel totally right at home with a bunch of other guys who are semi-famous for no apparent justifiable reason."

Autumn Thunder urges you to hide and protect all memorabilia from this season and treasure it forever.



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