Thursday, July 31, 2008

After All That Work...

So similar - yet so different.

This was a big two weeks for outstandingly-talented yet academically-challenged defensive tackles. After three years trying to become academically eligible, Jerrel Powe has finally made it past the NCAA clearinghouse and can play for the Ole Miss Rebels. On the opposite side of the fence, our "Lion King" Marques Slocum has unfortunately flamed out and will probably not play college football for the forseeable future.

After hitting the books for three long years, Powe is probably a guy who knows what an opportunity like this means to him. If he plays well and doesn't screw up off the field, he is probably going to be a multi-millionaire in 2-3 years. As Brian has mentioned before, some kids are built for one thing and one thing only: football. If not for football, Powe would probably be stuck in a lower-middle-class lifestyle while working as unskilled labor somewhere in the South. Now, because he has a shot to capitalize on his greatest strength, he has the opportunity to live a life that most of us only fantasize of living. Good luck this year, Mr. Powe. You've earned your shot.

Marques Slocum was only two years away from paydirt. He showed promise his freshman year, and if he had solid sophomore and junior seasons, he'd probably be taking home a lion's share of NFL draft money in 2011. I'll never understand some people. All that talent and then they screw it all up. Maybe he'll pop up at a lower-tiered BCS school in a year or two, or some FBS team will take him on next year. He'll have to pass the clearinghouse again, which may be a bar he can't hurdle. Slocum may have destroyed his chances for living the good life - and if he says he regrets the way he acted this summer, I'll be he's not lion.

Friday, July 25, 2008

Who Does Dollaz Love The Most?

Damn ladies! You both look fine as hell! What's a playa to do? Shizzle!

These days, Big Billy Dollaz has a dilemma - he has to make it rain for both Rodriguez and Beilein, but money doesn't grow on trees. On one hand, Dollaz is now obliged to help Rich Rodriguez pay off his WVU buyout. On the other hand, he has promised John Beilein that he would overhaul Crisler Arena. I know Dollaz is a master funderaiser and somewhat of a fiscal boy-wonder, but this is a lot of cash. Either Rodriguez or Beilein is going to get the shaft here.

I think we all know which one is going to get it.

There are three reasons why John Beilein is going to suffer because of Rodriguez's buyout.

1) John Beilein is not as attractive as a coach right now and will be put on the backburner. After a really poor first year at Michigan, Beilein's stock has dropped since his tenure ended at WVU. It is likely that the upcoming basketball season will be a tough one, and that Beilein will be labled as "not getting the job done." If there ever was a year for Dollaz to stall on appeasing Beilein, this is the year. Beilein has no leverage.

2) Football is king at Michigan, and Dollaz is very cognizant of the program that is going to bring the athletic department the most loot. Rodriguez will be kept happy in order for the team to be running on all cylindars and bringing home the bacon at full capacity.

3) Rich Rod is more aggressive. He seems like the type of guy who will never let someone else get in the way of what he wants or something he thinks he deserves.

So, Coach Beilein...hope you're good with a broom and dustpan.


Saturday, July 19, 2008

Lloyd Carr's All Disciplinary Action Team!

The long jowls of the law.

In the past few weeks, Brian has posted The All-Lloyd Carr Team, and valiantly attempted to do an Anti-Carr team. Keeping with that spirit, Autumn Thunder proudly presents...

The Lloyd Carr All-Disciplinary-Action Team!
Here are the rules: Players were draftedfor the All-Disciplinary-Action Team based on the knuckleheaded things they did while at Michigan. Any transgressions which occurred after graduation/leaving the program for the NFL/getting kicked off the team will not be considered. This is not a comprehensive list, because not all disciplinary action gets picked up by the meda.



QB: Brian Griese
Before Griese quarterbacked Michigan to the 1997 National Championship, he had a little incident at Scorekeepers which culminated in his arrest for the felony of malicious destruction of property.
Disciplinary Action: Indefinite suspension (later reinstated, obv.)

RB: Kelly Baraka
Baraka's career was cut short before he really had a chance to shine after his second arrest for possession of Mary Jane.
Disciplinary Action: Kicked off the team; banished to football obscurity.

WR: Adrian Arrington
Adrian Arrington was mired in a controversy which involved domestic abuse and possible grand-theft auto.
Disciplinary Action: Long suspension; many hours of stadium step running.

WR: Mario Manningham
During his third year at Michigan, Manningham couldn't help smoking the magic plant.
Disciplinary Action: 1 game suspension

TE: Carson Butler
Carson Butler was involved in the Saint Patrick's Day massacre where a student was beaten within inches of his life.
Disciplinary Action: Temporarily kicked off team.

LT: Adam Stenavich
Adam Stenavich got a little cranky at a bar one night and was arrested under charges of disorderly conduct.
Disciplinary Action: Suspension

DT: Larry Harrison
Larry Harrison was arrested after had a little trouble keeping the mouse in the house. EWW!
Disciplinary Action: Kicked off team; banished to football obscurity.

DE: Eugene Germany
Like Manningham, Germany couldn't say no to dope. While it was unclear if this was the straw that broke the camel's back or it was related to another incident, Germany was kicked off the team after this infraction.
Disciplinary Action: Kicked off team; banished to football obscurity.

CB: Johnny Sears
Aside from sucking, Johnny Sears got caught with pot one too many times.
Disciplinary Action: Kicked off team; banished to football obscurity.

CB: Chris Richards
Richards was the third member of the terrible trio who assualted a student on St. Patrick's Day 2007.
Disciplinary Action: Kicked off team; banished to football obscurity.

I'm sure this list is incomplete...please help me fill in the holes!

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

NCAA 2009 Reviewed!

I have taken the first screenshot of McGuffie hurdling somebody. YAAAAAY!

I'm back! I'm still trying to find a workable copy of Photoshop, but I got my computer back from the Geek Squad and posting shall resume on a regular schedule once again.

I rented a copy of NCAA 2009 because every video game store in my neighborhood had sold out of them yesterday. While I haven't tried the online dynasty mode yet because I didn't sign up for XBox Live, the single player mode is enjoyable, though largely the same from previous years. I think the fluid motion animations and wide open game play were a bit over hyped because while the players do move a little better than in year's past, it does not feel substantially different.

As Brian noted earlier, it is nearly impossible to tackle somebody. Sometimes, it seems like every player on the field has a Mike Hart-like tackle-breaking persistence and won't go down without a second tackler. The college atmosphere is emphasized more with gratuitous cut scenes of cheerleaders doing flips and waving the school flag after big plays.

There are a few errors with the Michigan team that I was kind of surprised to see. There are a few players whose numbers are wrong (Steven Threet wears #15, Sam McGuffie wears #34), and most shocking, Sam McGuffie is purple. He looks like a version of Grimace on steroids. He is fast and nimble, though, and I have made him hurdle people multiple times to great delight.

A notably great thing EA Sports did was nail Michigan's away uniforms before they were released to the public. They look just like the ones that were revealed to the world a few days ago, right down to the maize stripes on the side and back.

I'd say this is a solid game, and let's face it...we're all going to buy it anyway.

Who wants to be in the Autumn Thunder online dynasty league? Any takers?

Friday, July 11, 2008

I've Fallen and I Can't Get Up...

Hello AT Readers,

You may wonder where the hell I've been these last two weeks. Unfortunately, my laptop went haywire almost 10 days ago and it is being “repaired” by the Best Buy Geek Squad. I say “repaired” because these idiots wiped my entire hard drive clean while re-installing Windows and removing all the computer gremlins…and they deleted all my programs including my trusty bootlegged copy of Photoshop!

I hope I’ll be back this weekend.




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