Who Does Dollaz Love The Most?

Damn ladies! You both look fine as hell! What's a playa to do? Shizzle!

These days, Big Billy Dollaz has a dilemma - he has to make it rain for both Rodriguez and Beilein, but money doesn't grow on trees. On one hand, Dollaz is now obliged to help Rich Rodriguez pay off his WVU buyout. On the other hand, he has promised John Beilein that he would overhaul Crisler Arena. I know Dollaz is a master funderaiser and somewhat of a fiscal boy-wonder, but this is a lot of cash. Either Rodriguez or Beilein is going to get the shaft here.

I think we all know which one is going to get it.

There are three reasons why John Beilein is going to suffer because of Rodriguez's buyout.

1) John Beilein is not as attractive as a coach right now and will be put on the backburner. After a really poor first year at Michigan, Beilein's stock has dropped since his tenure ended at WVU. It is likely that the upcoming basketball season will be a tough one, and that Beilein will be labled as "not getting the job done." If there ever was a year for Dollaz to stall on appeasing Beilein, this is the year. Beilein has no leverage.

2) Football is king at Michigan, and Dollaz is very cognizant of the program that is going to bring the athletic department the most loot. Rodriguez will be kept happy in order for the team to be running on all cylindars and bringing home the bacon at full capacity.

3) Rich Rod is more aggressive. He seems like the type of guy who will never let someone else get in the way of what he wants or something he thinks he deserves.

So, Coach Beilein...hope you're good with a broom and dustpan.

Thoughts?

Will Big Billy Dollaz Make It Rain For RichRod?

Buyout shmuyout, yeeeeeeeeeeeeeah booyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

By now, most of us know that Rich Rodriguez's deposition has been released for our reading pleasure. Will this solve anything? While I have no legal experience, my gut leads me to believe:

1) Neither Rodriguez or WVU is going to budge on their stance in the near future.
2) After much bitterness and lawyer's fees, Rodriguez and WVU will eventually just settle the buyout sometime over the summer and get on with their lives.

Now while the potential settlement will probably be less than $4,000,000, it will most likely still be a hefty chunk of change. The question is: will Bill Martin throw a few bucks Rodriguez's way in order to soften the blow - and should he be obliged to? Is there any negative ramifications for Michigan if Bill Martin tells Rodriguez he's on his own?

Thoughts por favor.

Spring-alicious!

RichRod needs to take the edge off his frustration while installing the new offense.

Ah, spring practice is getting underway for our team. Hooray! Reports are that things are a little ugly for now, but they will no doubt improve over the next few weeks and during all of late summer camp.

Spring practice! It's GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREAT!

On a random note, maybe it's just me, but Calvin McGee REALLY looks like Tony the Tiger.

Rodriguez/WVU Pissing Contest To Continue.

I still have a lot left where this came from!

Today, RichRod offered to pay 1.5 million dollars of his 4 million dollar WVU contract buyout. The intention is that because of this show of good faith, WVU will take the money, call off their dogs, and let RichRod get on with his life at Michigan. The probable result? Ed Pastilong and his one-toothed jug band of lawyers and accountants will tell Rodriguez that he's 2.5 million dollars short and this ridiculous pissing contest will continue.

If this were an actual pissing contest, I think RichRod would surely win. Why, you ask? He would have Barwis train his prostate using the latest scientific methods and transform him into a picture of urinary perfection, capable of both the speed of a sprinter and the endurance of a champion racehorse.

Rod Wants To Get A BJ!

So there's this new dude in the picture named BJ Daniels, a dual-threat QB out of Tallahassee, FL. He's 6'1'', 201 pounds and is the #8 ranked dual threat QB on Rivals.

I'd be happy to see this kid in a winged helmet if we can't get Terrelle Pryor. Both will probably announce on signing day, so we're all waiting to know if we get a quarter back who fits RichRod's new system no matter what.

Up Close With Rich Rodriguez!

The story has been out for three days and nobody thought of this picture yet? Hellooooooo?!?!?

With all the bad press about the Shredder-Gate floating around, Autumn Thunder is proud to present an interview with Rich Rodriguez with hopes that we will all get to know him better as a person, and not think of him as a cold-hearted football program sabatoging meanie.

CC: Hey thanks for doing this interview!
RR: My pleasure. Just keep it cordial, ok? Make me seem like a nice guy.
CC: You got it. So, what's your favorite Tom Clancy novel?
RR: Easy! The Hunt for Shred October. Oops! Freudian slip there. Don't mind that.
CC: It's all good. What's your favorite Italian dish?
RR: No question there - shred-ucinni Alfredo. Damn! I did it again! I must have something on my mind. Please excuse me.
CC: Think nothing of it. Now then - what is your favorite movie with Julia Roberts?
RR: I loved her in "My Best Friend's Shredding." Wait...DARN! CRAP! What is with me today?
CC: Beats me. Back to the interview, please. I'm quite busy. Who is your favorite horror director?
RR: Al-shred Hitchcock. I mean FRED. Not SHRED. F-R-E-D.
CC: What do you like to put on your nachos?
RR: Jalepeno peppers, red onions, and sharp shredder cheese. Whoops! I DEFINITELY meant cheddar.
CC: Who is your favorite member of Pearl Jam?
RR: Hands down, Eddie Shredder. I should have shred Vedder. I mean said Vedder! D'oh! Sorry, my mind is elsewhere. SHREDDER! SHREDDER! SHREEEEEEEEEDERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
CC: It's ok. Do you want to pick this up another time?
RR: Yeah, I think that's best. We'll talk again soon, I'm sure!
CC: Oh, I'll rest a-shred that we will! Thanks!

See? What a nice guy!

Reel Him In! Reel Him In!

Look at this lunker! Going above the mantle for sure!

Now that Ryan Mallett has decided to transfer, the stage is set for Terrelle Pryor to come to Michigan.

Good luck to Ryan Mallett. The chips didn't fall his way here - but he'll surely be successful wherever he goes.

RichRod, he's all yours now! GO GET THAT BIG BEAUTIFUL QUARTERBACK!

Rich Rodrig-YESSSSSSSSSS!

Dollaz comes through in the end.

Oh Dollaz! I can't believe you pulled this one off. I apologize for all the photoshopping of you I have done in the last two weeks. Maybe you didn't know what you were doing during the search. Maybe this was all dumb luck. But whatever.

I hereby forgive you for stressing me out for the last month and thank you with the utmost gratitude for this awesome early Christmas gift.

Welcome to Michigan, Rich Rod.

Rich Rod? Re-Guess.

Hey! Let me go! Woob-woob-woob-woob-woob!

Well, that certainly would have been awesome. I hope Rich Rod enjoys the raise we just gave him.

The death march to Ron English continues...