Showing posts with label Jim Tressel. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jim Tressel. Show all posts

Monday, January 7, 2008

Yes, It Was Just Like That.

Bow down to the hat!

It's 7 minutes to go in the third and the game is far from over, but I know where this one is going.

Damn you, SEC speed!

Monday, December 3, 2007

Giant Douche Vs. Turd Sandwich.

Crappy, even for my standards.

If the enemy of my enemy is my friend, than who is who? Whoever wins, there will be no "Ha Haaaaaaaaaa!" Moment for Michigan fans.

Saturday, August 18, 2007

Big Billy Dollaz's Punch Out!

This game is rated D for Dollaz!

Big Billy Dollaz has once again shocked the Michigan community with the release of his new video game "Big Billy Dollaz's Punch Out."

"Yo Yo Yo! I've been droppin' Franklins and Hamiltons left and right lately. All the scrappin' and stuntin' our boys have been doin' has burned a hole in my pocket. Lawyers fees, bail money, silencing the press...damn! I needed to make some quick cash. My liquid gold fountain in my office was starting to dry up, and son, you never, never front on a man's liquid gold fountain." said Dollaz.

"So I licensed this video game. I figured with all the punches our boys have been throwing over the last few weeks, this game would be tighter than Mary Sue Coleman's ass in a press conference. Forshizzle!"

Punching him in the stomach does nothing - too much flab in the way.

"The first opponent you face is Flubber McGobbles. He's an Irish guy who kinda looks like Charlie Weis, but is most certainly not Charlie Weis, due to all that legal shizzle. He's rated really high in the game, but he never lives up to the hype."

He's a crafty one! Punch him in the brain!

"You'll also duke it out with Shifty Vesterson. He uses really good strategy in each bout and winning against him is never easy. What's that? Did you say he looks like Jim Tressel? Hellz naw! Any likeness is purely coincidental, homeslice!"

Punch him in the mouth before he causes massive damage!

"One of the toughest opponents in my game is Yappy Gumflaps. Look how big his head is! He comes out really pumped up, and he taunts you a lot. For some reason, beating him is extra satisfying these days. Oh, and he is definitely not Jim Harbaugh. Word."

Controversial or not - I am buying this game tomorrow! It will be a nice change from NCAA 2008.

Sunday, May 6, 2007

Tressel Gets Fab Five Makeover!



Autumn Thunder is thrilled to be the first college football blog to report Jim Tressel's stunning new look for the 2007 season. After nearly a decade of patrolling the OSU sidelines in a sweater vest, Tressel is taking his wardrobe to new heights courtesy of the Fab Five from the smash TV series "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy." What do we here at Autumn Thunder think? FAB-U-LOUS!

"Well, that sweater vest was just so BLAH!" said Queer Eye fashion guru Carson Kressly. "Instead of that vest, I put him in a delightful rose colored suit complete with a snazzy tie and a precious matching handkerchief. The color is close to Scarlet, but not as ugly. Coach T's new look will say, "Hey Mister, I mean business! I'm gonna score some serious homeruns on you!" But at the same time, it says "Maybe we can all go out for a mani-pedis after the game! Yay!" I think this will go over big with the fans."

Kyan Douglas, Queer Eye's grooming expert, said "The coach always had a turtle-esque" look, but I gave him a tan and put a little swoop in his hair. Even if he doesn't score a single point this year, he'll still be first in the BCS rankings - and by BCS, I mean 'Being Crazy Sexy!' "

Will Tressel's new look fly in 2007? Autumn Thunder invites you to judge for yourself.

 

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